I have nursed 2 of my four children for 5 months, the other two I attempted and went to formula with in the first month. Why: I am not sharing this to advise you in what to do, but to let you know you are not alone. My Advice: Talk to your practitioner.
I wanted to nurse so badly.
1st child: I nursed and supplemented, she never gained weight properly until I stopped nursing.
2nd child: acted hungry in the first week, I did not want a repeat scenario, so I went directly to formula.
3rd child: I nursed for 3 weeks, when she became less active I made the switch.
4th child: As nursing has always been some thing I have wanted to do, I made my most humbled effort.
God blessed me with a wonderful midwife. I trusted her insight and experience. I asked all the questions I that my pride didn't allow me to ask with my first three. She assured me that I was fully capable of nursing my baby. What a relief, some one who believed in me. I surely did not believe in myself at this point. Not believing in myself may still have been my undoing. Yet, I was able to solely nurse our last child until she was 4 1/2 months old. I was successful in that she was that she was thriving and gaining a little weight.
I am know there are many people who would continue to judge my decision to go to the bottle. I however could not sacrifice my baby on the alter of my pride.
The big questions I came to were "In light of eternity, will nursing or not nursing make a difference?", "Will my nursing give her better quality of life or allow her to live longer/forever?" and "Does this matter to God?", "Didn't HE make my body to do this?"
I had to forgive myself. I felt like such a failure even though I nursed solely for 4 1/2 months. Answers: The most important thing I can give to my child is not my breasts, it is my life. My life with Jesus, teaching her to follow her Creator. Nursing or not nursing will not change her life as GOD is the one who knows the number of her days. As to quality, that is in God's hands too, and my living a life in devotion to God. Yes, Yes, Yes, it does matter to God because my pride was involved. And, yes, HE did make my body for this, BUT do not forget this is a sin cursed world. I am no Eve, only one of her daughters 6,000 years removed.
Concerning pride, the Bible tells us to examine ourselves: I Corinthians 11:28, II Corinthians 13:5 and Galatians 6:4. I was very proud at that time. I was attaching some of my self worth to fulfilling one of the "female rights." As we reap what we sow, my fall was great. I was not looking to my Savior for my satisfaction.
As I confessed my sin of pride, my Shepherd applied the soothing balm of HIS Word. I found comfort in I Peter 3:3-4: "Do not let your beauty be that outward adorning of arranging the hair, of wearing gold, or of putting on fine apparel [or the 'girl scout badge of nursing']; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible ornament of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God." (NKJV)
Because my life was crashing down around me, I needed to know where my value lay. God in HIS mercy showed me HE is my value and following HIM is my life's love.
I have to praise HIM for allowing me to live in a time when baby food is easy to acquire for the survival of our children.
Stay tuned for these topics, as they are close to my heart.
1. The lonely world in between nursing and formula
2. Exactly how long was I expecting to nurse my baby?
3. Benefits of nursing after 3 months
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19 hours ago
11 comments:
I was intoduced to nursing by my husbands family. All the women nursed their children. The first time I tried with my daughter it was sooo painful. I thought this really is not any fun. ouch ! I had learned all about the benifits of breast feeding from my doctor but still I just wanted to give up. My husband encouraged me to keep trying. It took awhile and then I got 'tough titty's' as I called them . I nursed all my 4 children and each time the same painful start. I really believe even if you just nurse a little in the first month even just that is so good for your baby. Me?? well I was pretty greatful to start them on a bottle when it was time. Great for the Grandmas and Aunty's and Daddy's that want a little bonding time too.
I just to think all women have milk and I felt very let down when I had no milk to give to my only child. The lactate group make it so bad for women who do not have milk. Their reason is all women have milk. They are wrong.
I talked to my mom. She told me some of my paternal aunts did not have milk but in my country the women shared to breast milk their babies. Sister in laws would become milk mother to those babies whose mothers do not have milk or not enough milk. I thought my mom was being nice to me and I did not believe her totally until my investment mentor wife talked to me. She and her husband were missionaries in Bolivia for over 25+ years. She said she was very sad when she did not produce any milk for her baby. She said she often envied those Bolivian women who breast feed their babies and she had to give bottle milk to her child. She said those Bolivian women thought she was some weird white woman who would not even gave her own breast milk to her child but some bottle milk.
In our class, breast milk is so emphasis that I think it is so very wrong. I know breast milk is good in many ways like it contain mother own antibody which can protect the baby for the initial few months. But now because the breast milk movement is so strong that it really make bottle milk mother feel a second class citizen.
I had no milk or whatsoever with all kind of methods, sigh. I love my son so much that even I did not had milk, I let him suck on my breast before and after I gave him bottle milk and I did that for almost 6 months.
Mom, Thank you for your imput. It does me good to learn a bit more about your experience with nursing. Mark was my encouragement too...he kept saying "think shoe leather!" I'm sure you can imagine what I wanted to reply.
Jamy, I know your pain. I too believe the enphasis in the latation community is over board. I had a hard time at Church. I felt like I had to justify my self to them. Thankfully the ladies tried to encourage me, but did not sound judgemental. It was still hard on my pride...I really wanted that 'girl scout breast feeding badge'.
I am not a mother but I can share my mom's experience. She breast-fed my sister for more than a year. When she had my brother, she had no milk.
My brother's wife tried to breast feed their sons and in both cases, she had no milk too.
I am not a mother. If I am, it's great if I can breastfeed, it's OK too if I can't. My friend shared that the Lord does not give me any kid of my own so that I can put my attention to love other poeple's kids.
Doesn't the Lord teach us not to be judgemental? I feel that the society should understand and emphathize with those who could not breast feed instead of judging them.
No worries Rachel, the Lord understands.
Don't ever feel guilty for giving the bottle. When I had my daughter a year ago, I had planned to nurse her exclusive for 6 months.
However, I had problems with producing and my baby was hungry all the time and didn't gain weight on her 1 week visit. Her doc asked me to supplement.
When I heard that, I was crushed. I cried and cried.
I went for breastfeeding class when I was pregnant and the lactation consultant told me, every women will produce enough milk for her baby.
I believe her completely and when I couldn't, I felt like a failure. Later I found out that some women, due to physical reasons, just could not nurse their babies.
I nursed my baby part time for 8 weeks before completely switching to formula and I believe that my baby and I are much happier after that.
The most important thing for your babies is that their mother is happy. When you're happy, they are happy.
Rachel
Can you please e-mail me? I'm tagging you on the linky love train and wish to explain further. I need your e-mail address. Thanks.
Jesie
Hooi imm, Thank you for visiting my site. I had the same feelings at you, Crushed! Failure! I too, believe too much empasis is placed on our ability or inability to breast feed. Also the lactation cusultants are treating the medical practitioners as enemies. This breeds, in my case, a distrust for the medical profession. It was very important for me to have a midwife and be able to trust her knowledge when it came to breast feeding...I had to supplement.
Jessie, It is so good to get to know you. I am so glad to hear your out look on not having children of your own "so you can love other people's kids." There are also many kids that don't have parents. When I first could not nurse I did not want to believe I was incapable. I am so glad to hear all your stories, to know that I am not alone and that it is a falacy of our current society to believe every woman can nurse. I am glad that Lactation cusultants are available...I believe not as many woman would even try if it were not for them. The many woman who are capable. It is nice to know it is normal to not be able to nurse as well. We do live in a sin cursed world.
Nursing is really good for children as well as the mum..
www.keeyit.com
Thank you Keeyit for visiting my site. Yes, nursing is good for babies and their moms. I am grateful for the time I did get to nurse. If we had more kids I would try it again.
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